This Is My Brain Without Internet Access

[queerbychoice]

::cries and throws things at the stupid idiotic @#$%^&*! nonfunctional dialup that hasn't worked in over 48 hours::

I seem to have been suddenly flung back in time and forced to live as a cavewoman. Currently, my only functional internet access is at work and even my free ISP which is supposed to be my emergency backup won't let me on either.

WARNING: The warranty for a functional Gayle is rendered void if the Gayle is left unplugged for more than 24 hours.

Comments

[lilituc.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to remember the last time I couldn't connect at all. Ah, yes, I was so desperate and irrational I signed up with AOL and consequently became embroiled in a battle with them over my money since their service never worked.

I'm pretty sure my warranty would expire, too.

[queerbychoice.livejournal.com]

Quite definitely not in the least!

However, the airlines aren't good about letting people pick times of day if you want an at all decent price, so you might have trouble accomplishing that.

So what exactly did you dream? I'm jealous; I had some sort of dream last night but I can't remember it anymore, and I'm pretty sure if you were in it I'd have managed to remember that, so you must not have been.

[queerbychoice.livejournal.com]

you shall have to dream a sequel now.

i actually managed to dream about you last night. apparently i have a talent for determining what i shall dream about through sheer willpower. it was incoherent though, the kind of dream i'd have forgotten completely except i went, "wait, jeremy was in that! so i have to remember it!" and then i lay in bed for fifteen minutes trying to collect as many incoherent details as i could.

there was another dream before it that was more coherent. i was in a class; the teacher reminded me of an english professor i had in college, an incredibly tall incredibly skinny woman who always seemed to hesitate before any word she said. i never quite liked her somehow though i can't think of the slightest reason why i didn't. anyway, the teacher was sort of like her but the students were sort of like kids from my elementary school. one of them, a little short scrawny boy with a smirk permanently engraved on his face, kept causing trouble. i was the teacher's pet and when she left the room once she asked me to watch him and write down anything he did wrong for her. then she came back and started writing on the blackboard, but while her back was turned he got up anad started drawing on another part of the blackboard, drawing pictures making fun of her. i nticed before she did but i was afraid to say anything. then he finished and purposely made a loud final flourish with his chalk to draw her attention.

she hanged him. literally, with a noose, in the front of the classroom. as his punishment. and then class was over, and all the students started filing out. some annoying boy commented to her gleefully, "hanging people is FUN!!"

she looked sad, and replied, "no it isn't." but she seemed to accept that occasionally, hanging students was just something that had to be done.

so. er. that was the first dream. after that came the one with you in it. nobody got hanged in that one. this is good.

i was in a little courtyard of some kind, after dark. you were not exactly there, but i was thinking about you intermittently throughout, and the thoughts were good htoughts of togetherness and peace and well-being.

there were stepping stones on the ground and a fence enclosing the whole area within ten feet or so in all directions. over the fence were bare winter tree branches everywhere, and through the branches, the moon. this was where i lived, in some future time; possibly there was a house of some kind attached but i'm not clear on that, i just know it was my yard. also over the fence, in the neighbors' yard to the right, was a huge tacky 12-foot-high inflatable Diet Coke balloon.

i dream awfully weird things. i don't even drink diet coke. or any coke, for that matter.

so! anyway. the balloon was tacky and it was completely destroying my yard's appearance and i secretly harbored all kinds of angry desires to plot for its destruction. but in the meantime i just wanted to take pretty digicam pictures of my yard in the dark and the moon through the tree branches without getting the stupid Diet Coke balloon in the frame. so i kept trying all different angles and in the meantime i was thinking about you. among other things, i was thinking about your friends test from a while back, and in the dream i suddenly "remembered" that when you asked about your nationality i had (in the dream) indicated that i believed you were a swedish immigrant and spoke with a thick swedish accent. i had since learned that this was, erm, not true, so looking back upon that time i felt rather silly but also rather amused by it.

at some point you were sort of present, or half-present, in a transparent surreal kind of way, and able to converse with me. you said, "if i'd been a woman . . ." and then you were going to finish the sentence but it didn't happen because things got more surreal than ever and we were sitting together in the strange Diet Coke nighttime future but we were perched looking over this preceipice back in time watching the entire decade of the 1950s swirling around below us at rapid speed, moving through towards the '60s in a matter of a few minutes. it was odd. and then i woke up.