queerbychoice | Survey of Queers

Current Mood: okay
Current Music: silence

Survey of Queers

I received an email today from a queer sociology doctoral student conducting a survey of queer people about our attitudes regarding families, marriage, and relationsips. The survey is all multiple choice, so it doesn't require you to write anything essay-like, and the questions are generally pretty well-written, so it's not too hard to find a choice that more or less applies to your situation. (Though the phrasing of that standard question "When did you first become aware that you might be non-heterosexual?" always annoys me. :p I feel that the proper QBC-inclusive way of phrasing that question is "When did you first begin considering yourself non-heterosexual?" because this avoids implying that we had to guess about what we were.) And if you choose to provide your email address, you might win $75 in a drawing! And anyway, it's for a good cause. So you should fill it out, okay? You must be queer to participate.

http://www.socioscape.com/quo/

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It wasn't too bad, but I was annoyed by the whole gender/sexuality binary thing, as it forced me to provide untruthful answers. So, in a shocking show of uncharacteristic nerve, I wrote them an e-mail telling them this. I hope they don't laugh at me.

I considered not finishing it because of the marriage vs. civil union questions they kept asking.
Question for you: in America, what is the difference between a marriage and a civil union (even for different-sex couples)? How does marriage work there? Is it just a question of semantics? Am I not realizing how big a part religion plays in all this?

The only difference between marriage and civil unions is whether the word "marriage" is used or not. And yes, it's almst entirely because of religion that the semantics are such a huge issue.

So the civil unions for same-sex couples that are possible in the States, or those that have been proposed, are equal to the civil unions offered different-sex couples?

There are no civil unions offered to different-sex couples here. Different-sex couples can get married or, in some states, they can choose to have domestic partnerships, which involve far fewer responsibilities than marriage. "Civil union" is a term used exclusively when offering same-sex couples all the legal rights of marriage but refusing to actually call it "marriage" in order to preserve heterosexuals' sense of superiority.

Oh Jesus. But "marriage" doesn't involve any religous ceremony unless the people involve want it, right? I mean, it's basically a civil union with a different name.

I really don't envy you your struggle to get equal rights.

"But 'marriage' doesn't involve any religous ceremony unless the people involve want it, right? I mean, it's basically a civil union with a different name."

Yes, exactly.

not to be obnoxious, but civil unions don't actually provide all the legal rights of marriage. they cannot effect any federal-level rights of marriage, since they are at the state-level of authority. for instance, a non-U.S. citizen getting a civil union with a U.S. citizen would not be granted citizenship (i'm not sure if a non-U.S. citizen could even have a civil union with a U.S. citizen actually...). and someone's 'civil union partner' wouldn't benefit receive their veteran's benefits after their death and so on.

so, religion isn't the only difference between the two. and actually, i don't know if i agree that religion must always be in the present, or must always be in the future, necessarily tied to the institution of marriage. it can change and actually it's certainly undergone a strong shift towards secularization so far in western history.

"they cannot effect any federal-level rights of marriage, since they are at the state-level of authority."

Yes, but marriage does not provide those rights for same-sex couples either, because it too has only been enacted at the state level.

"and actually, i don't know if i agree that religion must always be in the present, or must always be in the future, necessarily tied to the institution of marriage."

I certainly don't think that myself.

Unrelated to your post: Sorry about the accidental posting to

abolishgender. I was trying to find my post so I could delete it, but obviously it had to be moderated and hadn't appeared.

Thanks for this link! :-)

Hi! Quest for Quotidian is my survey, and since it's closing soon, I thought I might say thanks to those of you who participated. I've tried to follow
discussions about the questionnaire over the last couple of months, and I appreciate all the comments here and elsewhere.

By the way, I like the "QBC-inclusive way," and in the future, I think I will use G's question: "When did you first begin considering yourself non-heterosexual?"

thanks again to everyone. :)

tm

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Survey of Queers

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

disagreement

Re: disagreement

no subject

Big thanks!